You know...
I hate to be alone, because when I am alone, I tend to think a lot.
Thinking of unnecessary stuff and make myself feel down...

I am trying my very best not to think so much by occupying myself with some other stuff to do...
But I got very tired... of doing all those stuff... I hate facing the comp all day long...
I wanna go out, but no one accompanying me, all of them lazy to go out.. or they are working...

I thought of working, I even found a job and after discussing with my mom, she say its not suitable for me and the salaries wasnt that good...

Yeah, ytd I apply for poly, not even a single soul asked me, so what courses you apply ?
Only those "fakers" ask me this qns...

Anyways, I went bukit panjang plaza today to buy gifts for my grp members to thank them for working so hard for the past few months...
I feel happy that Dini accompany me... for the first time, I am buying stuff for a guy...
I walked around Daiso again and again and bought something which I like... so as to make him remember that there is this girl called froggy...

I gonna give them the gift maybe this friday or on the 8th which is our exam....

I am sorry, I cant be happy right now... But I promise you that, I will be alright soon... :)

Apply for poly

Hi there.
I apply for poly today !!! YES !!!
I apply the courses that I can apply and what I want and good for future.
LOLS.

Actually it kinda took me quite long... to decide which one to choose.
I want interior design so badly, but end up I didnt choose that course its because.

1st, I got not enough points to get in.
2nd, which leads to reviewing on my portfolio which I dont know what to put inside.
3rd, chances of getting in very slim

Yeah, I know you guys gonna say, hey, u should just give it a try, if need show portfolio then show lo.

But, hello, I think very far...

when I was in secondary school, I took this interior design module before and the pple say that.
Every month, the income not stable one, how to support myself ?
Hear from friends that their siblings also took interior design, but when come out to society to work,
its very hard to find a job... And most of the pple want experience designer... Freshly graduated wont get the chance one !

Should I go according to my interest or good for my future ? OR both ?

After thinking through, these are a few courses which I apply...

1. Animation & 3D arts. NP
This one, is something which I am learning now somemore after I graduate, I can further studies, SIT university... OR go work under lucas film company ?

2. Interactive Media. SP
Might not be able to go for further studies but I can at least look for a job and work as a web designer :)

3.Game Design. RP
UH HUH !!! The course I am studying in right now. Further studies, Digipen University :D

4.Intergrated Events & Project management. SP
yeahhhh, I feel that I seriously need this because I cant manage a event properly and etc... So why not go in and learn ? Somemore can work also and further studies...

5.Architecture SP
Why not ? Its just the exterior of the building only !!! hahahaha. I build before and its good to give it a try :)
Good for future as well. Just like my long distance relative, they also study this and they are now with some degree holder, somemore can go university also !

I am quite happy with what I have chosen and also. Feels abit sad too abt interior design, but its okay, I believe that no matter what I choose the outcome will be good.
And my NYP letter havent come yet D: IDK HOW !!!! grrrrr

Hi... its sunday... lots of unhappy stuff happening... and I cried...

Tmr I need to apply for poly already...
I dont know what to do.
I dont know why I feel so insecure... scare... and many more which I am like so hard to type in words...
I wish that there's someone sitting right beside me now. Or talk to me at least to make me feel more secure...
Talk to me as in call me... so that I can feel ur presence... I doubt so...

I am all alone now... good night...

Ma Po Tou Fu & Korea

Its a Saturday yet I wake up super early somehow I an say its auto wake up... 7am plus, before 7.30am ...

Yeah ... went down to the market then have breakfast with mom bro and mom's friends...
My eyes were so small that mom's friends say that I havent fully wake up... yup true...
Stay there, eating breakfast, listening to them gossiping...

Around 10am plus, we went to buy ingredients for Ma Po Tou Fu...
went home and not long after, 4th aunt came and she bought me I love Thailand T-shirt, a froggy shirt.
But the froggy shirt is small size, so give it to my cousin instead.
I choose the winter wear I want and yup... might be flying to korea around december first or second week.
If not beijing..
Later on, 3rd aunt came and taught us how to cook Ma Po Tou Fu...
Chit chatting session after that and yup...
I went to fetch my cousin from tuition and bought her lunch, for the first time I feel like I am a big sister :D

Yup, I spend my time staying in the living room and went sleeping cos I need to sleep.
Dinner after that with aunt. :)
End of today.

Last day of school.

I wanna blog abt today, the last day of school...

Yup, I wake up at 6.45am, auto wake up, just to go school to back up and submit our FYP assignment.

BUT !!!! I didnt bathe and go to school... because I dont know what time the lab will be open and I dont want to waste my time waiting for the lab to be open !

I slack at home by watching youtube videos and learn how to cook !!! ^___^Y
I learn how to cook boiled rice and guess what !!!
First time only I PASSED HAHAHAHA !!!!
Then, there are nothing left in the fridge, only the chinese sausage... :(
What I mean by nothing left is that the fridge is empty !!!

FYI, I dont know how to cook chinese sausage... :( I know I know I know I am not good in cooking
but I shall prove you wrong ! I went to youtube and search, yet its all in vietnam lols, I dont understand :(

NEVERMIND !!! I try to cook the chinese sausage by myself !!! -winkwink-
Seriously I was very worried that I might fail and wasted the food...
But... NOPE ! I PASSED !!! :D

Another thing is, I dont like to eat rice that is dry, very very dry, I always go with soup, sauce or gravy.
I took the oyster sauce, mix with hot water and pour everything together...

Mix it :D
The outcome will be like this :

:D 

Then, I put it nicely into my froggy lunch box that Eudora bought for me :D

Guess what, it taste so good so nice la !!!! SO HAPPY ABT IT !!! :D:D:D

Prepared and went to school ...
Back up my files and wanna render my work... for portfolio but smth went wrong... *le sigh*

The rest of the time, I spend it on rearranging my FYP file.
Imagine for the past 4 months I have created 707 items for FYP.
Actually there's still got more cos of the assest, that I need to put into the flash to make it look animated...
So, its like more than 707 items ? LOLS.

After arranging more than 707 items, I put it into my teacher's hardisk together with our grp members work.
Clean the whole lab for my classmates, cos they left the lab already =.=

While cleaning I keep sneezing... So can u imagine how dirty it is.... not dirty but dusty and its air con...

After school, zura, eudora and me went to have dinner first, a very early dinner and we walk from esplanade to marina bay sand that area...



Let the picture do the talking... :D

 My dinner is the Ramen :D:D

Oh yeah, btw, we were having a hard time Q-ing up cos

got one NO SELF DISCILPINE CHEENA go and cut our Q.

And cos before the NO SELF DISCILPINE CHEENA cut our Q.

Got other cheena placing orders as well. They order so much and keep on wanting extra soup.

And when the NO SELF DISCILPINE CHEENA  cut in, all the Q order went messy..

And we have to wait v long, plus the way NO SELF DISCILPINE CHEENA cut Q is, push pple aside one. STUPID CHEENA GO BACK TO UR OWN COUNTRY LA.

Act one korean. Our land no place for you. #justsaying.

 After eating, we walk walk walk...

 The very first time I saw this... #heartmelt.

 We reach this place and its actually a Water show hahaha. That start at 8pm and 9.30pm, Free of Charge :D

 NICE :D

 Walking to Raffles City MRT station cos wanna go home edi ~

 Fabulous ~

 Surrounded by High rise building ~ I feel like I am a small ant crawling here and there :D

I enjoyed myself and feeling quite relaxing. :D hahaha. Anyway, I shall end here :D
BYEZZZ, Do enjoy those photo...

FYP- Over.

Yup the presentation is over...

Ytd was really tired, head cracking and lead to fever.
Then morning eas extremely tired to the extend that every teacher whom teaches me before asked if I am alright. hahaha. Sleep quite early ytd. No matter how early I sleep, I will still be very tired...

And I am v v v v v v v v v v v  v I continue with this post tmr okay ? I not i keep on nodding my head...

GRRR I am sorry, I was in half asleep mode that I dont even know what I am talking, so the presentation at first was alright, and then at the back it screw up.
Worst still, when I represent, I said winning page as losing page !!! T.T
Then audience down there were saying, NOOOOOO ITS WINNING PAGE !!!
But I am glad that, they are paying attention to my slide !!!

During the Q&A, there is this lecturer saying that we should publish our game online cos its good and etc...
Other than that, no other problem...

After the presentation, Eddie, Eng Chuan, Alvin lai, Jasmine, Eudora, Mon, Lela and me wanna went to labrador park but cos we havent eaten anything yet since morning till evening...
(FYI: presentation starts at 12.30pm, we went to sch to prepare since 8am, around like 4pm near 5pm then its our turn to present, after us, still got other grp and were not allow to leave the room)
So we went Harbour Front to have dinner and then we walk around vivio balcony... :D

Reach home and bathe, very tired... Sleep v early too...

Sadness...

So many things went through my head...

1. Graduating.
This week is the last week of school. Need to wait till 8March to go back to school for exam.
I also started to miss school, my classmates, fun and laughter... I love how ITE life is...

2.Competing against time.
Yup, my heavy task for FYP is done. Therefore, I got nothing to do.
Leader - Eddie appoint me to Game packaging for our game. Also, do credits too.
I have to do my slides in the powerpoint. Printing poster and etc.
And the presentation is just the end after tmr. Will I be able to complete everything ?

3.Who will cheer me up ?
As I mention on facebook...
Mom : Why do you want to make pudding for them ?
Me : I see them do FYP do until very stress so, thought of making pudding to cheer them up.
Mom : Then when you do FYP, do until very stress and not happy, WHO will cheer you up ?
Me : ... ...

Her words actually strikes me...
Because I have never thought of this question before... I just want to make everyone happy.
And didnt thought of getting anything back in return...

Wanna thanks my mom for letting me think so deeply...
Who will actually do/say something to cheer me up ?
Guess... no one would do that... :)

Damian will cheer me up by saying something...

Who will be the one DOING SOMETHING FOR ME ?

Unlucky day

Hi there. Wasnt a very good day.

I bring pudding to school.
Was on the bus on my way to CCK interchange.
3 cups of pudding drop out from the plastic bag and 1 cup broke.
I throw away. And I realise that my plastic bag was dripping.

I was using Mei Zhen Xiang plastic bag btw.
Yup dripping and become wet and tearing soon.

I went to Lot one NTUC to buy tissue and some plastic bag.
I transfer all my pudding into the NTUC plastic bag, I even ask for extra plastic bag, lols.
Found out that another cup of pudding broke... -.-
Hearbroken... I said byebye to the pudding and throw it into the dustbin.

Was late for school.
Pple were Q-ing up to tap their card to get off frm MRT...
When it is my turn to tap, suddenly a guy came and tap his card and end up my card scanning got problem and have to check my card... =.= !!!!
Walk half way and found out that the DM at the gate there catching pple with improper attire...
DIEDIEDIE !!! I didnt wear uniform, I just wear the black shirt and short shorts...
Luckily they didnt catch me :D

Oh yeah, I fall down 2 times !!! =.=""" !!!!!

I told all these to Jasmine and Eddie over there listen while doing his work and keep on laughing non-stop !!!

Went down to basketball court to sun tan haha, cos Eddie and Aloysius need to do make up lesson for SW.
Smth happen to our FYP grp, so got to inform Eddie and I stay there under the hot sun.

The other reason I went down to basketball court is because I have got nothing to do while waiting for Jasmine to convert my music... LOLS.

Went back to class around 11am and import music, arrange the file properly and went for lunch :D:D
Eddie keep teasing me -.- Like hold my hand and feed me like that !!! -,-
Talked to Olive and I learn a lot of things... is that
When we girls like someone.
 DONT EVER TELL THE GUYS THAT YOU LIKE HIM, LET THE GUYS CONFESS TO YOU.
After I listen to this I was like WOW... T.T that means I like someone, I have to keep it to myself and bear with it lo ? T.T Very xinku one leh !!! T.T Hais...

Anyway, I went back to class and start to distribute pudding because the people starts to come in already.
As in, they all go for 1pm lesson while, me Eddie and Jasmine went 8am lesson.
hehehe Yup ! I dry the container after that eat... Walking around the class and keep asking my grp members if got work for me to do or not.

Finally ! Got work for me to do liao, is that I need to model out the Doggy in cube form, cos I need to make a box in dog form to put our game de disc inside. YAY !!! I finish it within half an hour including adding texture and do the texture myself. When modeling, zura sit beside me, watch and give me ideas.
Then I need to make a CD cover. woohoo, But cos need go home liao. Thought of doing it at home...

Right now, I feeling very tired... So I guess tmr then do. So byebye !

I am done my part.

HELLO !!!!! GUESS WHAT ?!?!?!
I AM DONE MY PART FOR MY FYP !!!!
YAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tmr gonna put in music for my game, give to programmers.
Do powerpoint and poster design.

Yup !!! All these months was up and down... HAHAHA erm, i save the speech after the final presentation !

YEAH ! Today I make pudding for my fellow grp mates to cheer them up.
Cos I see them so stress, they didnt even smile. They just look at me with a very strict face.
And I hope that after they eat it, they will relax abit and smile :D

Oh yeah, there is a guy follow me in twitter.
These guy is my friend's friend and I regretted giving him my number.
He asked me a lot of question and he said that I am pretty thats why he then add me in twitter
And even ask me if I am single.

I lie to him, cos if I dont reply him, he keep spamming my phone...
I thought its just a normal friends, but he does not think that way...

I am thinking ways to get away from him.

Damian, good luck for your exam and do not be nervous.
Dont be over confidence as well okay.
Treat it as your normal homework.
Good luck :D

I am not someone whom you like.

You will rather spend your time doing stuff that you LIKE TO DO OR ETC.
But you will never spend your time talking to me because I AM NOT THE ONE WHOM YOU LIKE.

When you need me, you come to me.
When you dont need me, you throw me aside.
When I'm sick, do you even ask a simple qns if I am okay ?
No, you dont.
You dont care !!! You treat it like I am a super human or whatsoever... You understand ?!!!?

The same thing always happen again and again without fail that every night the same thing happen to me again and again. I am tired of all this... really very very tired...

Its time to say Goodbye to you.
Your just another stranger from tmr onwards.

I know I said this many times but this time round I really meant it.
I dont want to hold on to someone who always hurt me, so firmly.
You dont need me, I dont need you.
Fair enough, I dont want to be a fool anymore.

A very lovely Saturday

Its a very lovely Saturday...
A feeling of me owning the house, because my parents wasnt at home. Plus its drizzling outside. The quiet, clean and dim with a bit of sunlight shining through the balcony window... I love this type of atmosphere... :)

Wake up at 7am plus and went back to sleep again because its too early.
11am wake up again and watch Johny Engrish with brother in his room.
Watch half way, Aunt came and brother talked to her while I stay in my room doing my stuff.

After Aunt left, both my brother and I spend our time, cooking together.
Eat our lunch together and watch Johny Engrish.

I feel very sleepy, went to take a nap and wake up around 6pm plus.
Play games and do my work while skyping with jasmine.

Yup, till now we still skyping, choosing the songs for each scene and many more...
I love how I do my stuff today because its so relaxing and the weather's just right.
I dont like to stay infront of the comp all day long. I wanna do something meaningful like cooking and etc.

I'm not a good blogger, I'm not good at expressing myself with words like most girls. I often find myself back-spacing a lot and thinking of the perfect words to say but I just can't seem to find the words that fit together to express what I truly feel. -From someone.

I need to breathe.

HI there !!! Sorry for not blogging. Cos I was busy with my FYP. Regardless of in school or at home.
All my mind was abt FYP, going home, one hour and a half journey was thinking abt FYP.
There were so many many small details need to be aware...

In my mind, its a picture of what I want it to be. When it comes to do it, I keep on stucking at those part that how I want it to be. End up wasting so much time working on it and when I become so nervous that my mind went blank, heart beat skip so fast and in the state of giving up...

This feeling went on quite a few days...
That leads to... drowsiness.
Mainly, when I was on the MRT platform and a lot of pple, I feel as if I am going to fall down.
I quickly sit down/lean against the wall...

Next, sleepyhead.
Keep on sleeping everywhere I am, toilet, when I was bathing...
Living room or any other room, my eyes were closed. Cant hardly open.
Eyes too heavy to open, when its open, its painful...

Also, I keep thinking negatively... Maybe because of how my friends treat me these few days ?

Nevermind its okay, at least, I take a deep breath, calm myself down and think carefully.
Thinking how to solve the problems that I am facing in flash and work it out.
Eventually, now I only left with the Ending part for my very own world.
I am glad that I work it through because, I thought to myself, nah, its not possible.
And it become that I am scare and didnt touch the project for during holiday that period...
I force myself to do it cos, its a project, its a must no matter you like it or dont.

I cut down so much on facebooking nnd many other stuff that I like to do.
It is al worth it, I feel that I improve a lot as I goes by.
I am proud of myself for doing something that I've never done and learn before.
Everything is ask pple or try by myself... Combine everything and make it mine.
To me, I am first timer, providing such work is the best already.
A sense of satisfaction

Tonight, I just wanna breathe slowly and smoothly.
Tmr, I will work my ass off.
Good night. :)

Thanks damian for being such a sweet and thoughtful boy ! :P

How I spend my valentine's day.

Hi.
First thing first...

This is done by me ! haha. Happy Valentines day to all couples around the world.
Happy International friendship day to those who are in the friend zome :)
Hope you guys found your true love soon :)

Okay, lets begin...
In the morning, I cant concentrate on my FYP. I just simply do a heart shape for the effect and went for lunch.
Today canteen was packed with pple. Pple selling roses, cookies and etc.
Also, to celebrate Total Defence day, there were many many army guys in my school...
Set up game booth. something like paint ball but its not...

Went up to class right after finishing our lunch because I hate crowded and noisy place...
I even drag zura and jasmine with me to go up to the class, sit outside, waited for one hour.
I know I very bad also because Mon and Lela still eating and I insist to go up first...

Yup, we have mock test...
 3 hours- Draw 12 keyframe and need to do video addicting...
Material provided - Tablet, 10short video clip, one audio...
We need to follow instruction given, the size for the background and each frame.
How many motion effects and transition need to apply.
Must use the title given...

Yeah.. I thought to myself, impossible...
I still tried my best, this is what I do...
-GO photoshop, make new file, 1200px x 800px.
-Make the frame for the pic, 360px x 240px
-Make the frame for the description, 360px x 100px
-Duplicate it until its 6frames.
-Save it as PSD and rename, so that later can open the file again.
-Watch all the video clips in a fast speed and quickly decide which scene you want to use.
-Take screenshot and crop it, paste it in photoshop and trace.
-Trace finish all the scenes and add description.
-Open the renamed PSD file and continue paste it in photoshop.
(cos already watch finish all the clips, already crop and saved all the 12 scenes.)
-Trace again...(actually cant really trace cos of the picture quality, best is to imagine urself and sketch)
-Add description.
-Save all the 12frames as jpg.
-Crop the frames and import all the pictures into the video editing programme...
-Follow the instructions given and use your creativity to make the video.
-Do finish the video, got time, do shading for the storyboard, so that can score more marks.

These are all that I have done today and I am proud that I can finish all and even have some time left ! ^^
I know my result for my class test, as in surprised test... did very badly... 23/25...

After school, changing clothes that time, I went to the toilet and idk why the toilet full of mosquito and I got stung by them, whole body very itchy... Some parts already red and swollen...
Anyway, rush for appointment today and yup... I was late for like 3 to 5 mins...

So, this is how I spend my Valentine's day, how about yours ? ^^

Good luck for your practical exam. :)

Hi...I wake up very early today to do my FYP at home...
Therefore late for school for 2 hours yet teacher didnt say anything...
Was v dizzy while waiting for MRT, somehow like got earthquake and I cant stand stable...

School was alright, didnt manage to do a lot of stuff.
Tmr got mock test for the game packaging thingy.
Wish me good luck and hopefully tomorrow can get back result for the class test !!!

Tmr is Valentines day...

so....





erm....








hmm...

Will you be my Valentines with this retarded face of mine ? *winkwink*

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA !!!!!! 

Just joking, byebye :P

Competitive and Motive.

Hi. LOLS. I dont know whats up with my brain that I keep thinking a lot.
haha, i know some of the stuff I rant before, but rant as in I didnt went in depth...

Therefore, I am here with my clear mind to say everything out !
Today's topic, as you can see from the title Competitive and Motive...

Let us know the meaning of Competitive and Motive first...

What is Competitive ?
Competition is a contest between individuals, groups, animals, etc. for territory, a niche, or a location of resources.
Hehe, from wikipedia one. :P
Also, having/displaying a strong desire to be more successful than others.


What is motive ?
something that causes a person to act in a certain way, doa certain thing. 
hehe, from dictionary.com :P 


Yup ! Do you have a better idea now ? 
There are many many ways like about competitive like business, studies and so on...

Motives too.

Now, I gonna talk on both of these thingy and its all about studies as in my school. 

As you know... or for pple who dont know, I am from art track... as in I was being posted to art track to design game assets for the programmers. :)

Back then in year one... My art sucks a lot... I only good in drawing cute stuff which has wrong proportion. :( Then when I walk around the class, I was shocked cos, other ppl's art were wayyyyyyyyyyyyy better than mine... By the way, in year 1, we were to try out programming and designing. My programming was realllllll cui...Surely cannot survive in programming track one.

So, thought of going art track instead. Or I quit this course. I was talking abt other ppl's art way better than mine right ? Yup. Then teacher told us that, it is very hard to get into art track because its really v competitive... cos there are another class also... competing with 100plus pple...

or maybe lesser ? hahaha... Need to have good result and need to see your design and etc...

While going programming class, there's no criteria, just that you must have passion in programming.

Must have patience...

Yeah, it was so competitive that I was somehow... feeling sad cos pple around me says that my work wasnt up to standard and they even bring me down... Pple like jasmine and cynthia...

I cried every night cos the feeling was sooooo sucks, yet you have to face them everyday...

That year, I keep everything to myself, cos its not safe at all...

Just imagine whatever they do have motives and all. Even up till now, I prove to them that I can go to art track, yet in the class, Jasmine still indirectly says me and so. Pple were asking me, how the hell I bear with her... She is just not happy with me and etc... Whatever I do, she not happy or will say it. Motives... so many motives to be mention... Got pple praise me, she not happy already...

Other pple, Eudora, yes... I said before, I dont want to repeat anymore...

Yeah ! I am tired, I am unhappy with all these stuff. Why must it be like this. 

Later on, I will become happy again... something abt me... its strange that I let go very easily.

I dont know if its cos i have to face it everyday or I am used to it. 

Its like... "Why she like this and etc..." go back home and I think a lot... the next day I forget everything... Later that same thing happen again and goes in a cycle...

Seriously I dont know... 

There are so many things that I'm used to it...

Used to being alone.
Used to forgive and forget.
and lastly, the most important one...

yup... This is the one that happens to me everyday... I am used to it.

A v boring saturday...

Hi there, second post of the day.
I wake up v early today, watch channel 8 drama; Scarlet heart cos I've been missing it a lot !!
End up, I went digging for the first ten eps but nowhere to be seen...
Was quite disappointed but its okay, I watch from 12or13 if I am not wrong, trying to understand
whatever stuff that they said. Anything dont get it, rewind again. Yes, this is the way I watch drama or movie on the comp. So dont judge me, I just want to have a better understanding.

Went to play diamond dash, a game that was wayyyyy too addictive that I keep on playing.
I introduce this game to my mom and she like it a lot. Gonna introduce my aunt too...
I help out to make logan pudding too. I didnt know how the hell my brother does it, cos I have a fight with him.... its not that I like to fight with him okay... Its cos the bowl is dirty and I wash it with soup and use the towel to dry it up and he dont like what I was doing. How do you expect pple to eat stuff that was being place in a bowl that is dirty ? You wanna be a chef yet you dont know anything abt personal hygiene or cleanliness ?
The most important part is that everything must be clean and not dirty, if pple eat already, Tummy pain, then how ? Are you going to be the one responsible for all this ?
Yeah ...fight with him over this and I was so angry that I went back to my room. Cos my aunt is over at my place...
I dont want to make a scene, then, I went back to the kitchen and help out...

Watched the movie Nasi Lemak and eat the logan pudding... Nasi Lemak was a nice movie... but i dont know what they talking abt cos they speak in different languages. Therefore, I just try to understand the movie and eventually, I understand the movie. hahahaha.

Enough of entertainment, I went on doing my FYP till I gonna vomit blood cos of the error and etc.
Or, it works in a way that I dont even like it. Trying to do research and etc but none of them really fits in...
Its either as2 or its just not what I wanted. I play around with it, end up more worse. I do this flash until I gonna burst...

Went to watch another movie again... This movie, keep making my heart hanging down there. Dont know if to go up or down. This movie, was that, The boyfriend die went go diving with the girlfriend. But the girlfriend lost her memories, she doesnt even know what happen and she really want to know. She keep seeing ghost and etc... She even went to see another guy who can actually see ghost. And want him to tell her if he see the boyfriend, cos she misses him too much that she hope he can appear infront of her.(lets name the guy, guy A) But the truth is she got hallucination. The boyfriend's sister send her to guy A, who actually is a Psychologists,
to delete her memories away... Which means, the earlier part whereby the boyfriend headless and the boyfriend's sister go diving to look for the head, isnt true... COS... the actual reason that the boyfriend die is because, when he wanna save his girlfriend, he give her the oxygen thingy... at the same time, he also call his sister to go and help.

When his sister carry the girlfriend that time, the girlfriend accidentally take out a knife and stab on the boyfriend's leg. By the time the sister wanna look for the boyfriend. Nowhere to be found.
A few days later, some pple found the body and its rotten already. (So its not headless la !!! SCARE ME!!! I keep using my bolster to cover my eyes sia and sit v far away from the teeveee !!!)

The sister actually tell guy A how the boyfriend die. At the same time, the sister got this urge to make the girlfriend guilty, so she put the video tape on the shelf. (The couple actually record everything when diving)
After the sister think through, she went back to take the tape, but its not there. Cos when the pple go to the girlfriend house to have a mini renovation, the video cam drop and the tape also drop out.

Eventually, the girlfriend saw the video tape and she watch it. Unfortunately, she only watch the happy parts only because the boyfriend's soul got the power to make the video stop so that the girlfriend wont feel bad.
The thing is, the girlfriend heard the boyfriend's name before but she dont know what is happening until she go to this bookstore and saw the boyfriend's photo and the book that he is selling. Somehow, make her remember that, oh he is dead, he is my boyfriend and we have an agreement by the beach and etc.

Cos the boyfriend wrote in the book that he build a wooden house by the beach and he wanna stay in the beach with someone he love... So the girlfriend ran there and stay there... And then one day, she saw a diamond ring at the wave there. She pick it up and then I think cos her mentally havent fully recover...
(the sister go look for her because she is responsible to take care of her, girlfriend went missing, when the sister know where she is by looking at the book cover... she go look for her and found out that she havent been taking medicine and then that is why her mental  become more worse...)
The girlfriend go drown herself after taking the diamond ring... It somehow make her think that.
Oh my boyfriend is in the ocean, so he left the diamond ring on the beach and I going to find him...

That is why, the book is call eternity...
This movie was v horror at the beginning part, until the v last part, its v touching.
The thing is, when you thought the show is going to end, no, its just deceiving... Still got a longggg way to go. lols. I was even asking myself, when is this movie going to end ...

After watching it, the part the girlfriend drown herself, affect me a lot. I was thinking, where will I be after I die... ? hahaha. STOP THINKING THIS !!!!!

Anyways, I was back to my room doing my work, yup still continue with flash... hais...
Spend hours doing it... but nothing come out. So tmr, I gonna do another scene already, all this let the programmer do ba. I am just only the one who provide the assests.
Oh yeah, ytd I sleep v late also. Cos I wanna show you guys my ANIMATION !!! T.T First time doing it. I am proud but I cant upload here... :( Sorry.

Next time, okay ?

ITE

Hi, this is just another rant, u dont have to read it.

So, now my aunt is in my house now.
Then she talk abt her daughter who is now in JC.
She said, there is this friend of her went on facebook and asked her, so hows ur daughter now, where she studying in and etc...
My aunt said that her daughter now is in JC...
Then this friend of hers said that, "wow study in JC, very li hai woh."
(btw, they communicate in chinese)

I was thinking... meaning ITE student bu li hai la ? I know, many pple will look down on ITE student.
Especially when the child is from a v good school and the parents go, hey, ITE student is blablabla, you shouldnt make friend with them. This one, might hurt but not so bad.
But then, I still wanna share, that time when I receive my O lvl result, I know I am going to ITE.
Because, I know that I am still going to fail no matter how hardworking I am when I study...
Yet, I still cry, I feel that I have let down my parents and etc.

One thing which I really regretted is that I accept the request to be part of Student councillor when I was in sec 3. Which is also the year whereby we build our foundation... There are so many events, hard for me to catch up during lesson, cos meeting end late. Very tiring and many more.
My result start to drop... no more top in class. No more pple coming to bootlick me (they always want me to teach them and treat me v nice but backstab me) Everything just gone. Even the top 25% also gone.
Okay, I know, no use regretted. Have to move on, so back to topic...
Yup, very few of them know that I going ITE. When I reached home. My dad was very angry...
Both my dad and mom quarrelled... I am sorry...

A lot of them, keep asking me, so which school you going to ? JC or Poly ?
I lie... I said, I going Poly.. And I told them to stop asking me this qns. cos I am not going to answer anyways. I feel very bad. First year, when I go to school, I wear jacket, cos if someone I know, saw me wearing ITE uniform, then how ? How am I going to explain to them ?
As time went by, I start to think that " hey, actually ITE not bad eh, a lot of nice pple, nice teachers and many more."  I start to LOVE ITE.

Then, I slowly telling pple the truth that I am from ITE, Game Design and Development.
I was happy cos this course is a very special course and its one and only course in ITE.
People who I told them that I am from ITE.
They were shocked, they said, I thought you said, you going poly, why you said your from ITE ?
I told them, I dont want pple to know and also to look down on me.
Some of them, REALLY DO LOOK DOWN ON ME and never talk to me anymore.
Some of them goes, oh so your from ITE :/ oh okay... :X then the conversation went awkward and somehow drifting apart and never talk anymore.
Yet, I am glad that some of them dont look down on me and still talk to me like before. ^^
Even though lesser pple talk to me, still makes me feel that, they are really my true hi-bye friend.

Another way is, they say words to shoot you indirectly. This one more hurtful.
This happen to me before, my house opposite is ITE west, thats why a lot of student took LRT to go to school.
As for me, I have to go to the opposite platform and board the train.
It is squeezy cos that time was early in the morning when sec sch students  & working adults have to board the train too.
A mother was bringing a pri sch kids. Both of them was looking out of the window and saw a lot of ITE students walking toward the campus...
This conversation goes...
"Ah boy, you better study hard hor, if not you end up in ITE which is not good."
"If you fail your english and everything, you will be there, so work hard."
"They are useless pple"
 and went on blablabla,
I was infront of them somemore...

Everyone says that ITE meaning Its The End...
Everyone says that JC student are those future pple who will become the government...

The main point is, did anyone know that, ITE students also can give it a shot and make it big ?
There are ITE students now, making big money, went university and etc.
ITE students are students who have creativity. They create new stuff. Bring it to the society and make pple's life more convenient.
How about those ITE students who study engineering ? They learn and help to repair stuff. If not how you pple gonna use the stuff ? Do you have any ideas on how to repair it ?

Maybe, there are some ITE students who doesnt wanna work hard and being lazy. All day long wanna make trouble only. This are pple who wanna give up on themselves. For me, I personally feel that, this type of pple, wanna give up on themselves is because... they see pple looking down on them, they feel so inferior  or got this feeling like "aiya, pple look down on me already, whatever I do, they wont even care or blablabla" Since pple give up on them, so they give up on themselves...

On the other hand, there were pple who smoke, dress like gangster, sleep in class and etc etc...
Beware, they are pple who are top scorer, 4pointer, this are what we called "the black horse". Thats why, dont judge a book by its cover... Also, there are students who wanna learn too. Wanna work hard for a better future. They are struggling. Everyday, they have to smile happily. Yet the public still give that type of "look down on you" that stare. Do you know how it feels like ?

SO please dont be judgemental. Everyone is different, dont give us that type attitude and really think that, its the end for us. NO its not okay. I believe that all of the ITE students are hardworking and make it big one day. We will prove you wrong !!!

Also, I am not saying that, JC is not good. Just that its too good that pple put too much attention on them.
While we ITE students become so insignificant even though we did good stuff. Yet gaining so much attention when we just did one small mistake. A mistake that everyone will remember and pinpoint them...

Ehhh hihi.

Was feeling great today cos I actually did something which I dont think I can make it. hahaha.
Was kinda busy cos FYP went haywire... last min change the plan and then after a few discussion, we stick back to the plan.
Anyways, today is all abt FYP. hahaha.. I keep on chionging...

After school, Eudora, Hui Ju, Zura and Aloysius, we all went Nex at Serangoon. Cos Eng Chuan told me that there is this shop they sell lots of kermit the frog plushies... each for 8dollar, not too big and not too small.
Just nice. I might wanna go back there next week... should I buy 2 of it ? or just 1 ? Cos I feel that its hard to find it in Singapore... :( Idk leh...

Tmr, I gonna post photos... Not now cos, at least there's something happened today...
I post photos cos nothing happen and just for entertainment...
So... Good night.

Hi, so the other day... Hui ju Eudora and I went to Douby Ghaut.
It was a v last min decision because, teacher let us off early after we finish the surprise test.

Yup, during the journey, I rant a lot to them, I rant... about classmate, abt some girls in the class.
Who prefer to talk to guys rather than talking to girls... Rather to sit with boys than to sit with other grp which got me and the others inside...
I dont understand why they want to do this.
Also, about their actions towards some pple in our class... like stereotype.

We reached Douby Ghaut, we anyhow walk. Walk to plaza singapura; Diaso...
They bought me lunch box and a container whereby you can use for soap...
Its all got froggy in there... hahaha. They bought it for me cos after we go poly,
chances of meeting up will be lower... Thats why we bought present for one another.

After buying, we went separate ways. I witness, Thaipusam, the sharp metal thingy(many of them)
need to be poke inside the Indian man's skin. And walk around.

I reached home, I tried to hide the stuff, cos mom doesnt like pple buy stuff for me.
Still, she found out... yeah, she not happy abt it, I just keep my mouth shut.

Why is it that my life is like this... so unfair... I cried just now. Now I still crying, it just cant seems to stop.
Plus my eyes v pain already... T.T Red in colour...

*Hushhush dont cry..*

Hi... Today, my emotional nearly brk down during class.

Btw, ytd we had test, a surprise test, I am confident that I will get 24/25 because I got this feeling that I got one qns wrong.

Today we had another test, which is video editing, we got to make a video using the 12frames and audio which is given. I spend lots of time doing the editing, everyone do so fast... hahaha.

Cos they just add the transition and motion effects, never adjust and etc...

Back to topic, yup, a lot of stuff happen recently, was feeling really v sad...

I dont know why, people keep on lying to me... I keep on saying nvm nvm nvm, but deep inside my heart, I DO MIND A LOT. I myself dont even lie to pple. People ask me to do this and that then left me there, left me there being alone and so hopeless. I dont know what to do... I only know that, my stuff was so not interesting that it catches no one, when someone find someone/something better, they just left me there. AND never come and visit again. Then they keep on going to someone who is MORE BETTER THAN ME. Think i am what ? Your toy ? LIARS !!!

When I am sick for like so many days (till now i still am) I still have to PUT ON A FAKE SMILE and FACE EVERYONE ! Who will actually cares if I am sick or not. NO ONE. Yes, back then, last thursday, I tot they really care, but because, they want more pple go more merrier, if no special event, will they even care ? NO. Do you pple know that my tummy was so pain that i have to bend down a little to walk ? Drink glucose which causes my throat to have so many phlegm? I cant even talk properly... Whatever stuff I wanna eat, I cant eat...

When can I have someone who truly care for me... ?

I wanna be alone, I dont want to talk to anyone... JUST GET THE FUCK OFF FROM MY LIFE !!!!!!

Its all about you.

Are you shocked !!!! O.O ?

Damian :" LOLS yes i am shocked ! XDDDDDDDD SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEE !!! "

YES ! This post is for you.

I know you are v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v depressed lately...

I've been thinking v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v hard, how can I make you happy.

Actually till now, I am still thinking, cos its v hard to make you v happy.

Then, you tell me that, you like it when pple say abt you ! So this post for you la. hehe.

DAMIAN AH !!!

This boy, always like to talk to me. Maybe cos I can comfort him ? make him smile ?

I dont know...

All I know is, we both are v close, we can talk about heaven and talk abt earth. hahahaha.

He is a v talkative boy. Yet, v nice to talk to.

He talk a lot. even do jumping quest also can talk a lot until my friend say, why he talk so much one ah. That time, I was really GRRRR I feel like asking him to SHHHH cos I cant concentrate also. Fire burning within me. In the end, I hold it back... lols cos I am chill. hahahaha

He is v calculative. Got one time, he keep asking me which place de pot more cheap and over there doing calculation. The auntie-ness is there. HAHAHAHA

He is v smart. Can think of many many ideas and etc one. LOLS.

He is v hardworking. Always study study do many many stuff got to do with academics...

He is v ambitious. Got a big big big big big dream thats why he is hardworking, studying hard now. Yet keep on saying tired and v depressed abt what he currently studying for. PLS hold on okay, its all got to do with ur future. Bitter first then sweet.

He is v self disciplined. Maybe cos of his family background ? Or CCA ? LOLS. He gave me a feeling that everything must be done in order, do A , B then C. Cannot like A, C then B. lols.

He is half mature. If compare me and him, he more mature than me cos I am like some childish pple lols. His mind set is like different from any other guys whom I know when on my age.... hahaha

He is a perfectionist. That is why when I do things for him, I v stress one. lols. If i am not wrong, he loves to be clean and tidy as well. (he just gave me that type of feeling)

He is cute. Very cute. I dont know why, its like, the way he talk to me, just make me smile and laugh, I not happy I will read his msg. Most probably, he still young, thats why i am his jiejie. hahaha. He is v good to bully with, as in like TEASE him, not those bully okay.... hahaha.

More cuteness. hahaha.

I think thats all for now, If I found out some interesting character abt him, I will post again.

Its getting late, hahaha I been thinking for so long hahaha. yup.

WE BOTH NOW ARE V CLOSE AND WE ARE LIKE BROTHER !!! WOOHOOO.

brothers ! hahaha !!!

My condition.

Hi... this morning I had porridge and yup. I eat a few mouth my tummy cannot take it and v pain, wanna go toilet. But go toilet, nothing come out. So my dad ask me to eat another type of chinese medicine. Which is super awful. I ate that medicine and went to school.

During the journey to school, I keep on having cold sweat and tummy was really v painful. Tired and feel like I got no energy... Reach school circle line station and went toilet... Feeling kinda relieve..

Went to school, eat biscuit, eat medicine... Was feeling great.

When I reach home, I eat bee hoon. Tummy start to act up again... eat another chinese medicine, doesnt help either... Pain till now... Feeling of throwing out... Sigh ! Tmr I am not going to eat, just drink glucose i guess, hope it help.

From now on, I am not gonna depend on anyone, cos like I said in the previous post, my own flat. Meaning I need to be independent.

No one worry abt me ? Nevermind

No one care about me ? Nevermind

Feeling lonely and no one to talk to ? Nevermind

I gonna start training myself leading this type of life from now on, wish me luck.

Oh yeah abt the devaintart account, I wont be posting my work anymore... Gonna let it rot

STEVEN LIM GONNA SPAR WITH AARON TAN !!!

I keep laughing while watching those videos and those photograph... lols more like poster...

BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Hi there, saw the video above ? Do you feel that same way too ?
To me, yes, I feel that same way too but just that some of the part, its not the same as what I am feeling all the time. You people should watch. Cos its really v meaningful ! :)


I need to be inspired to do my FYP... Totally no idea and one more thing, its that I lost the game character de file... I LOST IT. wth...

Whatever, I dont want to think abt it now.

Today I wake up v early to eat the home make tiramisu because I know that if I dont eat it, it will finish v soon. And yes, I really can be someone who can predict things, the next second, tiramisu is gone. Then I eat curry puff... Followed by DIY popiah. I only eat a few, cos my tummy acting up again, the feeling of vomitting and etc. I seriously dont feel well at all.

I uploaded some work to devainart... but I guess I shall stop uploading cos no one appreciate it, so WHAT FOR ?!?!!

Gathering.

Hello ! Today I wake up v early WAHAHAHA !

Kay, was having flu and sore throat. Wasnt v happy cos mom keep on like not happy with me and etc. (i dont want to say here)

I keep cleaning stuff and i keep sniff sniff. FLU !!! irritating, keep sneezing also.

Slowly slowly everyone starts to turn up and was busy serving drinks and etc...

I didnt really take care of the baby cousin because she doesnt dare to go in to my room.

She keep on hanging with her mom then later slowly running here and there with ipad.

ALways peek into my room and slowly coming in to my room and play with the soft toys.

She play the soft toys while I struggling with my work... Also, my tummy keep on having cramp that I cant really walk, have to bend down. Yet, my mom and my relatives keep on calling me, to make coffee for them and etc cos they were playing mahjong...

I have to do it ! lols. At night, my jiu ma pulled me to play blackjack and then keep winning... later on, I lose whatever that I win back. lols. Then I stop and go bathe, the time I went out, they wanna go home le. Cos those senior mahjong player finish playing. Plus they v scary, cos they play like 100dollar plus plus ? LOLS.

Side track : Yeah, tummy cramp, wasnt feeling well. Plus, recently I start to eat a lot eversince after the steamboat session with classmates. Its like my health serious not that good. My fever keep going up and down. When its good, it can be really good, when its bad, its like the end of the world. LOLS.

Abt my cousin's gf, I really love her as in, cos she IS SUPER PRETTY she is from vietnam.

But, I hate how I was being compare to other female cousin, by my cousin and his gf.

And she didnt talk to me also. Never judge a book by its cover man... Sigh...

I dont like how my mom always complain to my relatives abt me and etc which is NOT TRUE.

Its v irritating. That how they doesnt talk to me like they used to. Thats one of the reason why I choose to stay inside my room doing my work.

I feel like I am a maid, cleaning stuff and etc. But doesnt matter...

My aunt ask me why I didnt help out in kitchen, i just said I dont know, main reason is because mom doesnt even like me to step into the kitchen to cook. She hates me stepping into the kitchen and make it dirty, I am still wondering when did I ever make the kitchen dirty. Cos everytime I will clean the kitchen after cooking.

I have a goal, to save up to 1000 for now, which will be reaching soon cos I cut down a lot, like I did not buy any froggy stuff anymore. I guess I will be buying my own house and then live by myself, in my very own world. Do my own interior design. Have some friends gathering.

Lead a peaceful life. PEACE !!! :D

Yooohoo ! :P

Let's start with the GPK first, I mention that we have to do the storyboard in one and a half hour right ?!?! hahaha !

So today, teacher actually show our work to everyone as in our classmates to see who can actually draw until v nice and in a fast speed. In this case, its all the speed that counts, your quality of work doesnt count cause, no matter HOW WELL YOU DRAW and YOU DIDNT FINISH SKETCHING ALL THE 12 FRAMES ON TIME = FAIL !!!

Scary right ? hahahaha. No choice... Speed drawing... hmmm... need a lot of practice...

Mine was the second one that was shown to everyone. Teacher say that I can pass because I sketch all the 12frames and she say my sketching not bad !!! LOLS. Kay la, everytime pple say not bad = I need to improve, nevermind IMPROVE GOGOGOGO !!!

When it comes to other people's work, all so nice la, but then they cant complete... = fail for them.

Don't talk abt school stuff. Today, I meet up with Dini, joyce and stephanie :D:D:D

Joyce bought me lots of froggy's stuff hehe. We chatted at the roof top garden at lot one.

Which was really awkward cos lots of couple over there kissing, touching, cuddling and etc...

One of them is my junior... i was like O.O !!! omg, at my age i still havent do this kind of things yet la. I am not those type who anyhow let boy touch me one !!! I feel so dirty and cheapppp..

Waited for dini to come and we went to another place, KFC !!! :D hahaha.

Was eating and then stephanie camp and we went to her house to slack ! I even help her eat her veggies, cos she dont eat veggies. LOLS.

We actually wanna watch the channel 8 show cos its the last eps already. While watching my mom called and scolded me. lols. Went home at around 10pm plus. Accompany stephanie to buy coffee and then we all headed home. lols. And this stephanie, going clubbing with her classmates la !! OMG i didnt even go before... I must admit that, my classmates go clubbing even during sch days, thats why they always late for school. Somemore like almost everyday lols...

Get home, kena scolding and blablabla, mom say wanna teach me how to make almond but she didnt even say she want teach me on friday at all. Always like to bullshit one.

I got v tired and went shower and KO on my bed. lols. Sorry that I didnt blog.

BABOOM !!!

Teeheee YESHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. lol I am crazy.

HI :D The moment I wake up, feeling quite well until when I was in the bus, feverish head again.

I thought maybe doing some running can help to get rid of the feverish head.

So I run, keep on running non stop for today's PE. End up, headache and fever risen.

Went to take a bathe but just should get any better. Eudora asked teacher if got medicine...

But dont have, idk who actually help me buy medicine when I was bathing.

The moment I step into the classroom, Eng Chuan, alvin lai and the rest of them, ask me "hey are you okay ?", "faster go and eat panadol" I was like WOW. lols. I was touched, really touched, cos nobody give a damn to me when I was sick. lols. Then later I found out that they wanna me to get better cos tonight going for steamboat.. LOLS. Eddie want me to go. And he said he did all these cos of me. lols.

I try to concentrate on my FYP and chiong all the way till sch ends... was feeling better.

Steamboat, lols. Funny v funny... Total of 18 pple going... lols. Wasnt really v enjoy myself cos too many pple plus that feeling come back. lols hais.

By the way, whatever I do, you wont be happy.

Hi, its the first day of the month. LOLS time passes so fast that 1/1/2011 is just like ytd only. :(

My mom wake me up today and I was of course blur then I asked her what day is it...

I crawl out of my bed and dig for my bed to look for time table to know the time I need to reach school... while digging, suddenly "PUMP!!" I was totally awake... cos my bag drop and inside my bag, I have a water bottle that has got water inside, which was like so heavy, knock onto my toe nail... PAIN LIKE HELL CAN !!!!! Omg... was so painful that I couldnt walk...

Mom faster on the lights cos I cant see and i hop to my bed to sit down... lols.

While going to school that time, I cant walk fast and pple were stepping my leg...

Getting more painful till now still pain...

When in school we have GPK !!!

Teacher want us to practice drawing storyboard. Cos during 3hours of exam, we have to draw 12 frames of storyboard and do video editing. Our exam will be on the first week of march...

Next week, we will be having class test, theory... Anyways, we were given a time, 9.30am to 11am to draw 12 frames after watching the video clip given and to choose and take screenshot of the scene, I was so indecisive la ! T.T And took out like lots of time choosing the suitable scene...

Anyways, I manage to sketch out all the frames and shade 6 frames, no description !

I need to improve !!!!

After that intense one and a half hour... hehehe I keep on eating shou dao ! I bought 8 to school.

1 for zura, 1 for eddie and the rest I ate it ! :D:D:D Meanwhile, my senior whatsapp me and keep on calling me but then cos my class cant receive the line or smth, so cannot call in lols.

Yup. This is the time when I FELT SO INSIGNIFICANT, he whatsapp me, I went out of the class to look for him, from far, i saw him, i wave... BUT he didnt wave back, so doesnt matter, I went into the class enjoy my shou dao and do my own stuff. Then he come in to our class, he didnt say hi to me but keep talking to other girls, I was like... erm... okay nvm.

When we are going back to class, we asked me which course I apply and went for the interview, I say interactive then he give me that kind of expression like wanna smile but dont smile keep on forcing himself dont smile that kind. I was like wth ? O.o Later, he asked jasmine the same thing, he said that he know who shortlisted, lols... SIANNNNN i got v nervous and of course really v sian cos its like, I actually let go of the interview and stuff and doesnt wanna be reminded again cos I know, I have NO HOPE at all. Yet he still over that bo dong wo de xin diao... By the way, I wasnt feeling well already, so I keep spamming green tea and water...

Reach class, do FYP and cannot concentrate cos I was really cannot take it, fever !!!! And whole body aching... Really v jialat...

Till now, still feel that same... :( Sometimes, even have those vomit sensation lols

So good night.. :)